I seem to be so utterly bogged down with work lately...not that i majorly mind. it makes me feel like i'm doing something useful, but at the same time i get alot of stress with it. I'm a perfectionist so something which should only take an hour ends up taking me 2! It's harder than I thought balancing art and english. art's so time consuming and more 'hysical' than english...if you understand my meaning. if i want to do art work, i have to drag all my paints and equipment out, whereas if i want to do english i just grab my folder and books. then problem is my concentration and energy levels. i've turned myself into a caffeine junkie again! lol i can't function without it! lol and i'm HORRIBLY grumpy without it! plus, because i only ever eat sweet foods i must get atleast 3 sugar crashes a day! lol i have to sort that out!
ooooh but people, I have good news =] well, not major news, but random happy stuffs. i now have sky TV! woop woop! free-view. annddd can't wait until friday night now. a couple of friends from uni are coming over aswell as one of my old buddies to watch some scary dvd's etc. i love Halloween =] i've got 2 little pumpkins already, which i'm gonna make my 1 mate help me carve i won't take no for an answer! haha what's not to like about getting elbow-deep in pumpkin mush and seeds? lol the messier the better! i'll then be doing my usual thing of making pumpkin soup =]yay!
I'm looking forward to having the flat to myself now, but also a little nervous (mum's been staying with me on-and-off whilst I'm back and forth to the hospital etc). I'm a little worried i'll get lonely again, but then i just keep reassuring myself that Sarah (like 1 of my new bestest uni buddies)only lives in town, like 5mins away so it's not like i'm utterly cut-off from civilisation! lol it's just getting used to it again you know? I keep having little negative thoughts slipping into my daily wonderings lately, but i'm seriously trying to attack them!lol i guess i'm doing ok at the mo life in general is ok...i'm in pain quite a bit and getting a bit stressed throughout the day, but in the long-run i remind myself of how far i've come...and it's FAAAR.I've made new friends, i'm more sociable and out-going, i'm getting stuck in to my work, i'm trying new things,moving on in the relationship dept. (i'll keep you posted on that )

sooo today the general plan is to finish off my 'dramatic writing' work, make myself beautifulls hopefully do some art and STAY POSITIVE! i'm in newport atm, so later will involve a couple of hours of travelling, but no worries...knowing me, i'll sleep through it! lol i've been so damn tired lately!

hope you all have a good week and had a good weekend. i should be getting internet at the flat verryyy soon, but if i don't post before Halloween...HAPPY SAMHAIN EVERYONE!